above lyrics from Red Hot Chili Peppers "Road Trippin'"
Another successful Scarlet Whore concert in the books. This one took place at Club Shattered in Columbia, MO on Monday. Other than some slight car trouble (not nearly as major as last year's fiasco on I-70), the thing went off without a hitch.
I've decided that they (the highway commision or the state) should name the westbound shoulder of I-70, spanning from Wentzville to 7 miles outside of the Boone County line after Scarlet Whore, with as much time as we've spent on that god-forsaken shoulder in the past two years. The Scarlet Whore I-70 Shoulder project is in the planning stages, at least in my head.
Got a phone call last night from an old friend. I love that. It's my friend Tyann from high school (the girl I may have mentioned regarding taking still shots and publicity photos for the Loaf project). She, Yoda, and I are going to the Grind down in the Central West End tonight, for some coffee/tea and some catching up. Tyann is a fucking riot. We talked for about 45 minutes on the phone last night and she cracked my shit up. The 1-2 punch of her and Yoda tonight should be too much for my seriousness to bear. I may actually resort to laughing my ass off most of the night. It'll be good to see her again.
This computer is backasswards. It's my sister's computer (I'm at my mom's doing laundry) and this computer is set up for those damn left handed people. Friggin' lefties. I swear.
Hey guys, I have an idea. Let's invite everyone to Kristen's for a party at 11 pm on a Wednesday night and then trash her house and blame it on Steve and Heather, cause we all know that they were the ones who trashed her house and they're the problem with everything in this world. It would embarass them and make them look like total asses .That would be very much fun.
*disclaimer -- the above was a joke. If it is not taken as such, you're a moron. Yes my friends, the Hizzy does in fact have a sense of humour. SHOCKING!*
At this point, shit has spun out of the realm of my control or anyone else's. When someone has gangrene in the leg, you don't kill the person. You just cut off the leg.
Link o' the blog -- no link today as all my fun links are saved on my home PC
Music o' the blog -- Stroke 9 "Kick Some Ass" (It's the only good thing on my sister's computer. The rest is all cRap and country and Gwen Stefani)
And now for a new Hizzblog installment -- Top Ten
Top Ten Things I Learned Since My Last Blog Entry
10. You can make a contest out of going to the flea market (mullets, teeth, Get 'R' Done shirts/hats..set up a point system, it's fun)
9. People are dumb enough to trust me for directions
8. My car gets awesome gas mileage on the highway.
7. Futons are hazardous to your health (if you don't believe me, look at the cut on my arm and the eventual scar that will come from it)
6. The feng shui of a room can be changed simply by moving one piece of furniture.
5. My two new favorite games (other than #10) -- chess and Texas Hold 'Em
4. When it says "2 left lanes closed ahead", people will wait until the last possible minute to get the hell over.
3. A room can go from clean to messy in just under an hour
4. Homestarrunner.com is a bunch of liars. New Strongbad email my ass.
3. Sometimes you'd never think a certain person would jump on the bandwagon (Click here to see which oft-absent friend of ours has a blog now)
2. If you're a nerd and you have a light saber and/or a Stormtrooper costume, you will end up on the news. Doesn't matter -- you still live in your mom's basement and will never ever get laid.
and the number 1 thing I learned since my last blog entry
1. Women now have the power to choose the sex of their children (Saw PV, talked to him about if him and Gena were gonna have anymore kids. Here's how the convo went)
Setting : Yoda's backyard
HIZZY : So, Nick, you and Gena gonna have anymore kids?
PV : Yeah, we're thinking about it. The next one is gonna be a girl.
CHUCK : So you want the next one to be a girl?
PV : I guess. Gena says she wants a girl, so we're gonna have a girl.
Seems like the more things change, the more they do in fact stay the same,
HIZZY
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3 comments:
"Oft-absent friend?"
That implies I've been in St. Louis more often than not at some point. (HA HA HA.)
Aside from snide comments, I've been in/with St. Louis in spirit as of late--been watching some Cardinals Baseball. It's become the other thing I watch on TV other than anime.
Example of Directions you MIGHT get from the Meddle Hizzy:
1. Take I-55 S to the Pevely Exit
2. Turn LEFT off the Exit
4. Keep going STRAIGHT until the road becomes unpaved
5. Get lost
6. When you come to a cow with a brown patch over his LEFT eye, drive around him five to six times and drive fifty miles bearing somewhere between southwest and northwest
7. Go up
8. Bake for 15 - 30 mins until golden brown (wtf?)
9. Put your vehicle in reverse, put a blindfold on, and pretend like you're running the Indy 500 (don't worry; at this point, there's nothing and no one around for miles to plow into)
10. There will be a guy standing on the side of road on Mondays and alternate Thursdays sometime between 5:17 AM and 6:37 PM. When he shows up, make a counter-clockwise U-turn, five clockwise half-turns, and swerve back and forth for ten minutes; then go RIGHT
11. Starve to death while futily trying to find out where the fuck you are and how to get back
(Just giving you shit, M.H.)
Hizzy has PV's number on that one...
That's like asking if the strippers ever get horny and just fuck you. Sheesh...what a yak.
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